The Misunderstood Child

The Misunderstood Child

I am the child that looks healthy and fine.
I was born with ten fingers and toes.
But something is different, somewhere in my mind.
And what it is, nobody knows.

I am the child that struggles in school,
Though they say that I'm perfectly smart.
They tell me I'm lazy - can learn if I try -
But I don't seem to know where to start.

I am the child that won't wear the clothes
Which hurt me or bother my feet.
I dread sudden noises, can't handle most smells,
And tastes - there are few foods I'll eat.

I am the child that can't catch the ball
And runs with an awkward gait.
I am the one chosen last on the team
And I cringe as I stand there and wait.

I am the child with whom no one will play -
The one that gets bullied and teased.
I try to fit in and I want to be liked,
But nothing I do seems to please.

I am the child that tantrums and freaks
Over things that seem petty and trite.
You'll never know how I panic inside,
When I'm lost in my anger and fright.

I am the child that fidgets and squirms
Though I'm told to sit still and be good
Do you think that I choose to be out of control?
Don't you know that I would if I could?

I am the child with the broken heart

Though I act like I don't really care.
Perhaps there's a reason God made me this way -
Some message He sent me to share.

For I am the child that needs to be loved
And accepted and valued too.
I am the child that is misunderstood,
I am different - but look just like you.

(Kathy Winters/2003)

Update

Wow! It's been a long time since I've posted anything. There are many reasons for my neglect, which I will address in separate posts over the next few days. The first is just that we've been busy busy busy! It's been a whirlwind of appointments, meetings, crazy work schedules, a new organization that we've been getting acquainted with, and some fun thrown in too :)

We've been having our usual schedule of Occupational and Speech Therapy twice a week and it's been going really well. Mykaya has become completely independent (except the use of her visual support charts posted all over the house) with showering, brushing her teeth and getting herself ready for school in the morning. She is now working on 4-step sequencing of directions and making her own visual supports. I am attending a seminar on visual supports on April 12 so I can hopefully help her learn how to make her own. There has been a HUGE improvement in a very short time so I feel that things are moving rather quickly in the right direction. We've also noticed that she has opened up a lot more over the past month. She engages us in conversation rather than answering our questions only. She has just really blossomed and I thank all of the wonderful professionals that work with her on a daily basis for the progress she's making.
 
We had our 2nd IEP meeting on March 22nd and were able to draw up an IEP for her. FINALLY! It's been a 2 year fight for this and I feel so thankful that Northridge has taken her needs and met them with an actual-on-paper plan. I will go into more details on the actual IEP when I get my copy :)
 
We started chiropractic care a couple weeks ago. We are seeing Dr. Sara Weigel at Active Life Chiropractic and we absolutely LOVE her! She has adjusted the girls 3 times already and because of the home-y atmosphere of her office the girls can kind of roam around and feel very comfortable there. They go in and get adjusted by themselves while I wait in the waiting area. I have noticed a big difference with sleep and the girls say they feel better so that's good.
 
The ND Autism Connection has become a great resource for us. I have been to the monthly support group meeting and Mykaya is involved in the play that they are putting on. She developed her own character (Ariel princess) and is really enjoying being on stage. The play is tomorrow and she could not be more excited. Due to work schedules, I will not be able to attend, but Jeremy will be recording it on the camcorder so I can see my little star in action! I am so very proud of her for showing the courage to step out and do something out of her comfort zone. It's very encouraging for me to see her participate in something outside of school that she enjoys so much. They also have several other activities and get-togethers throughout the year, so we look forward to getting to know other parents and children on the spectrum.
 
We are starting to enjoy the outdoors again, since the thawing has begun here in Bismarck.  Jeremy and the girls took Maestro out for a walk yesterday while I was working and they had a blast getting outside and having fresh air. We will hopefully be getting their bikes out this weekend and tuned up for many rides this spring and summer :) The girls are also starting swimming lessons next week at the Y during their after-school time there. They are excited to get back in the water in time for river trips this summer. Hopefully they can be a little more independent in the water.
 
Well, I guess that's a pretty good update; more later!

With love,
The Schulz's

P.S. We're gonna be on the news! One of the news stations here in Bismarck is doing a story on our family for Autism Awareness Month. They are filming this coming Thursday, April 10 in Mykaya's classroom and then at our home in the evening. Kind of exciting! I will post a link to it when it airs and try to let you locals know when we will be on :)